Monday, 31 March 2008

Standing In Power

I seem to be gathering quotes at the moment! Here's another I love:

" . . . our consciousness is not dependant on the body, but can extend beyond the limits of the sensory world."

This is a statement I've been aware of for some time but it's been creeping back into my consciousness of late. We experience this world through the body, and this world is to be experienced, we should not hold back from that, we should take pleasure in and of it, without causing earth or another person, detriment.

However, there is more, much more, than the physical experience of this world. We can journey beyond this. We should not limit ourselves to simply a sensory perception, but see with moonlight eyes by shifting our perception and altering our consciousness. Things look so different in shadow, and they are!

There is something about being aware of who we really are. If the Divine is immanent, then the Lord and Lady are within and we can live in this awareness, in this power, and move in that same power. We can move with a strength, with a spiritual determination that makes things happen and which doesn't apologise for being. We have our roots deep in the Underworld, yet we are also connected to the furthest star - the enormity of this is something that I cannot fathom, yet something deep within me is just starting to grasp this truth.

We are also connected to our ancestors, with those who have gone before and we can bring into this reality the gifts and knowledge that they have passed to us. It's all there, within, I just need to tune into it!

Sunday, 30 March 2008

Soul Reunion

This quote struck me quite profoundly today ". . . death itself is an ecstasy like love, but more intense, the reunion of the soul with its true self."

I'm sure pages have been written about such a statement, as the depth of this comment, the profundity of it, is not lost on me. In death we are reunited with Goddess and God, once again whole, as we were before we entered into this incarnation. We are returned to that place of love, that place of power as love that was once divided is here, once again, complete. This life is, in effect, a journey, a path, a longing even, to return to that place from whence we came and, as such, in this life, as much as in death and then rebirth, can we commence that journey of becoming who we really are, returning to who we were intended to be, before name and form. Our experience of life has caused us to adapt, to change, because this is how we survive the mundane, the day to day living, yet as we continue to do this day after day, year after year, we loose connection not only with Source, but also with who we truly are. Spiritual practice, our spiritual journey, brings us to a place where we are able to re-establish that connection with the Lord and Lady. She of the starry heavens, He of the Wildwood, our First Parents, Goddess and God who gave us life. Here, in whatever form our spiritual practice takes, as our connection is deepened with Divinity, so our connection is made with Self, our true Self. We begin to become who we were always intended to be, that journey of returning is commenced.

Saturday, 29 March 2008


I like the thoughts on Growth and Change that Ceri has mentioned. We have to move forward, we have to grow and change, or else we regress. I think that by opening to Spirit, to the Lord and Lady, we invite change. The Goddess and God won't let us stand still, procrastination really isn't an option when one moves in Spirit. But this is change under will, and I think that the Gods throw these options for change in our path, and we have to pick them up and run with it. When we open ourselves to elemental working, we are tested with fire, and although it feels like we are being hammered out on Waylands smithy at times, this is simply the result of working with transformational energy. To my way of seeing things, this transformation is about becoming the person we were intended to be before name and form, shedding the layers of adaptation that life can bring, pearing us back to who we really are. It's powerful stuff, and it can hurt a bit!

Friday, 28 March 2008

The Physical and the Spiritual

I'm wondering about the correlation between physical and spiritual health. My Blood Pressure appears to be ever climbing and I'm now taking medication for it. I'm not happy about that at all. I'm vegetarian, don't use salt, use olive oil and am relatively fit, and I like to cycle, so I'm somewhat confused as to what's causing this. I'm also taking a break from alcohol. Work is stressful, but then so it is for many people. So I think I have to join a gym! Eek! Can't say that appeals too much at the moment, but I think I have little option. It would seem that some lifestyle changes are called for!

I think it has to be a genetic thing - so do I just accept that this is my path for this lifetime, or do I get serious about my physical as well as my spiritual health? I value my spiritual life, and I experience this world through this physical body, so as well as enjoying the pleasures of the body, should I not be valuing and respecting my body more than perhaps I do at the moment?

I guess it's all about balance, as most things seem to be. I need to enjoy experiencing this world through this body whilst respecting the life and the body that I have been given.

So, a physical as well as a spiritual challenge presents itself!

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

Emily Dickinson

I was sent this poem by Emily Dickinson the other day and I think it's lovely, so I'm posting it here:

Some keep the Sabbath going to Church
I keep it, staying at Home
With a Bobolink for a Chorister
And an Orchard, for a Dome
Some keep the Sabbath in Surplice
I just wear my Wings
And instead of tolling the Bell, for Church,
Our little Sexton sings.
God preaches, a noted Clergyman
And the sermon is never long,
So instead of getting to Heaven, at last
I'm going, all along.

I love the way this poem talks of Nature being how we connect with the Divine. Something in this poem just summarises how all things are interconnected and sacred. I love it!

Tuesday, 25 March 2008

Let's Get Serious

It's the last few days of my annual leave and come Friday I'll be moving back into the old familiar routine of work. At least I have just the one day and then the weekend, so it will be something of a gentle reintroduction, but the thought of returning causes me to feel discontent. As I've been thinking about the need to balance light and dark, earth and sky - those aspects of me that are different, yet necessary to make the whole, somehow returning to a job that increasingly is causing me to question so much on so many levels just doesn't sit comfortably. I've some deep searching to do on this one and also, I think, I need to be scaringly honest with myself and those around me. I need to be making some firm decisions, setting my intention and setting my course as opposed to being blown hither and thither. It's me who needs to be setting the direction, the course as opposed to be allowing the course to be set for me. It's a call, I think, for me get serious about my magickal work and putting the things I've been learning over the years into practice.

Monday, 24 March 2008

Glastonbury Tor

Glastonbury Tor has to be one of my favourite places. I accept that historically it probably wasn't a scared place as such, historians seem to disagree on how the Tor has been used over the years, but to me the fact that Pagans today are claiming it as sacred makes it sacred - the intentions of so many have made the Tor special. So many pilgrims visit and carry out ceremony and ritual, both private and personal as well as collectively, that the place just radiates with positive energy.

Whenever I visit the Tor, which, being local, is as often as I possibly can, I feel a real, powerful, deep and genuine connection. Here, more than anywhere, I am conscious of my spiritual roots travelling deep into the earth, deep into the underworld, the home of Gwynn ap Nudd. It's like the World Tree, roots deep in the earth, branches extending to the heavens, and this energy is so tangible at the Tor and I connect with it so readily. The feeling of being grounded, connected and energised is wonderful.

Glastonbury Tor will always be a spiritual home to me. It's one of many places I hold dear, but it's probably one of the most special of all.

Sunday, 23 March 2008

Cats and TV

I appear to have a cat who enjoys watching TV! One Foot In The Grave appears to be her favourite at the moment!

Saturday, 22 March 2008

Chance Meeting

I had one of those special moments today where I met someone and it was like I'd known her for years. An older lady who was looking for someone to take her slot over in the ticket office at Chalice Well of a Saturday morning. I'd love to be able to do that, but with working full time it just wouldn't be practical, which is unfortunate, but the present reality. We walked back to the Glastonbury High Street together, just chatting, but chatting like friends and at some moments about quite deep stuff. She asked about work and I told her what I did and she reflected that it must be very stressful. I agreed and said that I wonder what will be left of me when I retire in 20 years. "There won't be anything left" she said, and she's not wrong. She told me about the time her husband, who was a senior probation officer, came home from work and informed the family that he had quit. The family cheered! I smiled, knowing that this is what I would like to do, but again, the practicalities of life take over. "You're always fighting yourself, aren't you?" she said, and again I agreed, there is this aspect of me. It's the Virgo with Leo rising element of me! I'm always learning the lesson of 'being' as opposed to 'doing' - it really is something of a cyclical lesson. I'd like to have the vision and bravery of her husband, but much as I would like to, it's a step that I don't feel able to take at this time. The cold reality of bills to pay and stuff can feel like a millstone around my neck at times, having what feels like a stranglehold on an otherwise productive and fruitful spiritual life. It's a balance thing again, I guess, and I don't have to feel 'less than' just because I hold down a demanding full time job - but at the same time, neither can I use it as an excuse for not moving forward on my chosen path. All to often I see the work me and spiritual me as opposing elements, whereas what I would love to do would be to truly integrate the both. That feels like an impossible dream at times, as the work ethic often contradicts my own personal ethic.

I think it's something that I hand to the Lord and Lady and ask simply that they guide me in the right steps to take and throw opportunities across my path that may cause me to start being able to move in a new direction - whilst there's still enough of me left!

Friday, 21 March 2008

Setting My Intention

The first stirrings of Spring are resonating within me. I am really very aware of movement in my inner world. There's a real and genuine awakening, there's a hunger, a drive to move on in my spiritual practice, an inner desire to progress spiritually and to achieve, to experience, to know and be known.

A long time ago I read of experiencing the 'ecstatic embrace of the Divine' and this is something that I long to experience. There are moments when this happens, usually when I'm out walking the land and enjoying my connection with the Divine made manifest in Nature, but this is something that I want to take further, deeper and to a more profound level. There is something about knowing Goddess and God as First Parents that I want to explore, to know what it is to be a Child of Goddess and of God, to know that embrace and the sense of connection, of being part of the whole, that comes from that. I want to move from head knowledge to soul knowledge and for my experience to broaden and widen.

This is me setting my intention for the year. This is where I want to go and this is where I want to be - it's in my hands!

Thursday, 20 March 2008


It's that time of equal balance, that moment where light and dark, night and day are of equal length.

One of the strongest feelings I have around being pagan is that sense of 'standing between.' A sense of being . . . called, almost, to stand in the space between light and dark, earth and sky, day and night - life and death, and bring those things, those qualities, those gifts into my life and the lives of others. Travelling, journeying, and calling into this plane those things from other planes. When I stand in this space, this place, I feel such energy it's incredible. I wonder why I don't stand here more often. Now, at this moment, at this special time, that call sounds ever louder, ever clearer. Sometimes the call is so strong it makes me feel as though I don't actually belong, that I'm somehow set apart - not in a special or privileged or arrogant way you understand, but just in the sense of being 'different,' of not actually belonging.

The excitement is brewing, I can feel it. Life is returning, I know it's time to move on, to step forward, the only question I have at the moment is "step into what?!?"

Wednesday, 19 March 2008


I purchased a new icon today, as you can see from the picture. She's called Source and she's by an artist called Philippa Bowers. I've admired this particular icon for some time now, but finally, today, I made the decision to part with my money and take her home with me! I'm thrilled that I did, I think she looks lovely here in the hearth. It's not her final home, she will make her way to my Temple Room once Equinox has passed.

I do love icons and I find they help me focus and set my intention. It's odd, really, because in my formative years I was raised as an evangelical Christian, where icons were not only frowned upon, they were seen as idolatry and therefore forbidden as they were anti 'the true God'. Now, as I move ever deeper into my pagan spiritual experience I find my idols and symbols as invaluable. They help shift my consciousness and they provide a real and genuine energy. Ritual is similar. I love ritual, because it symbolises intention, focuses my mind and spirit, creates sacred space and it has power because it's under my will.

Source shows me a state of mind, a state of being, that I long to attain. I'm not there, yet, but I'm hopefully getting there!

Tuesday, 18 March 2008

Spring Equinox

During the past few weeks I've been really aware of inner stirrings deep within me, a sense of inner turmoil, almost. Not an unpleasent thing, but a real genuine sense of all that is me and all that goes to make me who I am being in tension, one aspect playing off the other. There's a part of me that has been viewing those sides of me that I consider to be 'good' and those aspects I consider to be 'not so good' - a kind of compartmentalisation, putting bits of me into boxes and bringing the appropriate bits of me out at given times for given people. This only works to deny and suppress those parts of me that are equally valid, equally authentic and therefore as much me as any other side of my character. I don't have to apologise for any part of my nature.

I was sat at Chalice Well, in Somerset, today. I've made a brief video of this beautiful and sacred place, and you can view it here:

and here, in this sacred place, as if never before, I became aware of the need to incorporate all of who I am into my being, to bring down walls and allow that inner flow within me.

At Spring Equinox we are drawn to think about balance, but this is more than just balance, it's about being whole, complete, at one with self, with Spirit and allowing Goddess and God to bring this about within oneself. This is a lesson that I seem to be learning all the time, but today there was a real sense of the need to let go, to allow the Lord and Lady the freedom to work within me and to stop resisting their call to embrace the light and the dark of me, and to see both as one.

So new beginnings indeed!