I'm understanding, in a new and deep way how the exploration of self is all about relationship. It's about relationship with myself and relationship with the Divine. My relationship with Spirit moves to a new and higher level as my inner relationship deepens. It's like clearing out the conduit, getting rid of debris and dross in order for things to flow more smoothly, more effectively, more powerfully. Things were moving before, but this new level of personal work takes things to a new level.
Younger Self (YS) is full of such potential, but before that can be 'tapped' as it were, he needs to feel safe and secure to be able to step out of the shadow. YS tends to hide in the background, fearful of ridicule, and his role models have not been that brilliant. He needs to be taught by someone who actually values him and loves him for who he is. Talking Self needs to do this. It's weird, all this inner talk or 'self talk' as at times one could be forgiven for thinking that one has lost ones last remaining marble, but the effect it brings is amazing. There is a sense of wholeness, of feeling complete, and an inner sense of coming home. It is also showing me how destructive negative self talk is as it reinforces all the old patterns and negative belief systems that YS has. It's time to turn the tide in this respect.
Self love is vital here - an accepting and an embracing of self. All of this, all that I have written in the past few days can sound so feeble, so trite, so 'touchy feely' but in truth is profound stuff. When it drops from the head to the heart, it's life changing. When it moves from words on a page to words written in soul in indelible ink, anything is possible.
As my sense of identity grows, through this ever deepening inner relationship so my relationship with Goddess and God, both within and without, grows and deepens. My Will also strengthens and matures, and it is from Will that magick flows, love under Will, a Will based on a sound and profound knowledge of Self.
Goddess and God are immanent, within and without and all of this is about relationship; my relationship with myself, with Them and Them with me, because everything is connected, I am Part Of The All, there is no separation, there is no division, there are no walls - only the ones that I build. This is about a circle, a circle that cannot be broken because the ties are so strong, the relationship too deep, the connection too real.
It's real, it's there, it's happening, all I have to do is step into it.